Confessions of A Food Server

slickclickcf 10 months ago

all good points! keep your head up! i live in pa too. i have all the same problems. The one thing i think about 10 percent tips is i still get to keep a decent chunk of the bill after the tip out. on a hundred dollar bill. 3 dollars is taken out. 1 percent for all my tip outs. so if they tip 10 then i still am making 7 on that bill. even with a bad tip i feel i can still make a decent hourly wage from that table. Not to mention that i probably have a table or two more that will probably tip better during that same time. i feel that you probably are luck enough to have added gratuity to bigger parties?

Springs1 10 months ago

"Second Topic: Special Orders/Substitutions

I'm tired of people ordering a dish and altering it. I work in a fine dining restaurant and the dinners are carefully designed by the chef."

You sound SO LAZY, it's FUNNY, it REALLY IS!!

We aren't there for you, you are there to make money, so satisfy **US**, NOT YOU!!

I tired of lazy servers like yourself that don't get obvious orders correct to my table.

"Otherwise, if you don't like tomatoes and they're on the chicken, either don't order the chicken or pick the tomatoes off yourself."

GO FUCK YOURSELF, seriously, ASSHOLE!!

WHY shouldn't I get what **I** want for **MY** money just as you want what *YOU* want for *YOUR* money, huh?

I wouldn't order mostly all items if I felt the way you want me to order.

I shouldn't have to pick it out. Also, it saves the restaurant money if I don't want the damn tomatoes to just not get them.

"NO SEPARATE CHECKS! Figure the bill out yourself. Separate checks are a pain."

GOD, YOU ARE SO FUCKING ASS LAZY!!

You want the tip, but don't want to actually ***************WORK***************** for it!!

GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU UNCARING, SELFISH, LAZY ASS PERSON!!

You WORK FOR YOUR MONEY, it's not some RIGHT!!

I am tired of the lazy ass servers like yourself.

Springs1 10 months ago

"This is not fair that the government gets involved this way,"

It's not fair that you want pay for being lazy.

I order modified orders all the time, ALL the time and I won't stop for lazy ass people like yourself. The reason WHY I have tipped 25%-30% is because my orders are more complex, but if I ordered just as it came, their tip would be only 20% at most. You want more money, **WORK** for it.

I have before asked for separate checks in a party of 5 only because the people I was with don't tip very high and I don't want to get into a fight about that. I also don't want to pay for their stuff and they don't want to pay for mine when our bill is higher than theirs.

We have every right to ask for separate checks. Of course, it's a pain, it's MORE WORK for your LAZY SELF to do.

ADVICE: If you want to make more money, QUIT BEING SO GOD DAMN FUCKING ASS LAZY!!

Stef319 10 months ago

First of all Springs1, there's no need to use such profanity. Did I stress that I work in a FINE dining restaurant, with carefully assembled dishes?? I'm not lazy; in fact I am far from it. Yes, indeed I AM there to satisfy you, as a guest. I can guide you to the perfect wine pairing for your dinner; I can recommend the most popular local dishes. I will provide intelligent conversation, a friendly disposition, and I will do my best to make sure that you will have a pleasurable experience. And you probably will. And just so you know, it's not usually lazy servers who get your substitutions wrong; it's almost always the cooks who misread the tickets that come back to the kitchen. I cannot stress enough how busy a kitchen gets, and substitutions severely slow a kitchen down. I'm sorry, it's just the way it is.

I understand that you want to get the best possible experience when you go out to dinner; from what I gather you are very finicky. You stated that you make substitutions on a regular basis. I could understand a "no tomatoes", but it usually doesn't end with one request. It's usually followed with a "no onion, light cheese, sauce on the side, and mushrooms instead of peppers". Our menu is quite extensive; my point is that you should pick out an item that has everything you like. This way you're guaranteed the most flavorful dish possible, as our chef spends a lot of time building a flavor profile on his dishes. And our chef GETS PISSED when guests ask for omissions/substitutions. It is an INSULT to suggest that you can create a better dish than he. If you want the best dinner for your money, pick an item on our menu that requires no subs/omissions. That way you're getting a dish that has been designed by a very prominent chef.

As for the separate check issue. My time is more valuable in the dining room. Or the kitchen. Not on the computer. We have two computers and seven servers. There is no time for separate checks. I am insulted that you said I was lazy. When I have guests, I am all over them at all times, making sure that they are satisfied. Some of the longest times I have been apart from my guests are when I am separating and cashing out separate checks. It's selfish of you to demand so much of my time when I should be doing other things that are way more important to my other guests' dining experiences.

I doubt that you tip 25-30% on your bill because you realize that you are a pain in the ass. Most people like you put your server through hell and then leave a standard tip. You probably send items back as well, and I bet that you forewarn your server with a threat to send back anything that doesn't meet your "standards".

And by the way, I have been quite accredited with awards throughout my career in hospitality. I make very good money as a server; I am also a paralegal (and a part-time student), but the majority of my income comes from serving on the weekends. I have done very well for myself, and I continue to enjoy my job(s) most of the time. It's when I have to deal with people like you that my job becomes difficult.

Stef319 10 months ago

As for you, slickclickcf, thanks for the support baby! Most people don't realize how difficult our job really is. Yes, I do serve many large parties; I work at a resort whose primary focus is to sell real estate so we invite families to stay on the company's dime if they agree to go on a tour. I make good money and good tips but some people can be so challenging. I just don't act like that and I don' understand why people complicate their lives by being rude.

Springs1 10 months ago

"it's not usually lazy servers who get your substitutions wrong; it's almost always the cooks who misread the tickets that come back to the kitchen."

NO, it's ALWAYS YOUR SERVER'S FAULT if they bring out your food.

http://www.akronohiomoms.com/wp-content/uploads/20

This person put this picture of when they were at Chili's. Now, this isn't a fine dining restaurant, but you can clearly *SEE* with your *EYES* that this person has rice and beans. What if I substituted fries, you mean to tell me you are BLIND and ILLITERATE?

Now, the delay is the kitchen staff's fault if your server put in the order correctly and/or if the substitution is actually covered up by something that you couldn't tell if it was right or wrong unless you touched the food. Those are the RARE ONLY issues that a substitution would be a cook's fault in that the TIME, but the item itself getting to my table wrong that isn't covered up by anything IS the fault of the server or another server if another server brought out the food with the order put in correctly.. The me getting beans instead of fries is the SERVER'S FAULT if they bring me my food even if they put in the order correctly, because you left ONE ROOM, WENT INTO ANOTHER WITH THE OBVIOUSLY WRONG ITEM TO MY TABLE. You aren't blind or illiterate.

"I will do my best to make sure that you will have a pleasurable experience."

You said you aren't WILLING TO. Just look: "I'm tired of people ordering a dish and altering it. I work in a fine dining restaurant and the dinners are carefully designed by the chef." and this too: ""NO SEPARATE CHECKS! Figure the bill out yourself. Separate checks are a pain."

That IS NOT DOING YOUR BEST BY A LONG SHOT and you know I am telling the GOD'S TRUTH!! Just admit, you are lazy. It's not a pain to the people that aren't lazy.

"my point is that you should pick out an item that has everything you like."

Normally, there are NO ITEMS like that I would want like that honestly.

Rare times I have ordered a dish that I liked as it came, but it's really rare.

I substitute or modify just about EVERY DISH!

What if I want a burger or sandwich, does that mean I have to eat a plate of pasta(usually that would be ordering it as it comes), because you are too lazy and uncaring to want to do your job to please the customer, to make more money?

I think that's ridiculous. I wouldn't go out to eat then if I had to get something like that.

"as our chef spends a lot of time building a flavor profile on his dishes"

That's HIS taste and maybe even the majority of people's taste, but it sure isn't EVERYONE'S TASTE. SO WHAT if he spent time. I want them to make it the way *I* want it for *MY* HARD EARNED MONEY just as you want what you want for *YOUR* money that isn't hard earned it appears that you don't want to bust your butt for the customer for substitutions nor do you want to get them separate checks which is more work.

"There is no time for separate checks."

WHY should one tasks be *ANY* MORE IMPORTANT than *ANY* other tasks? Bringing me a refill or my food is JUST AS IMPORTANT as the check being separated. WHY do you think one thing is more important than other when people's money is VERY IMPORTANT to them?

There's always time. You can make time if you *CHOOSE* to. It's your laziness that's stopping you.

You make time if you want to. For example, I have had servers OFFER even at Chili's, Red Lobster, and Outback for them to box my food up for me rather than just give me a box. That's time consuming and also not necessary, but it IS EXTRA WORK for them. That's a good example of what kind of servers set you from the people that aren't lazy. You probably box the people's food, because you are in fine dining, but if you worked at those chain restaurants I doubt you would offer to do that for the customers.

It's just to say that they FIND THE TIME TO DO SOMETHING THAT THE CUSTOMER CAN DO FOR THEMSELVES. YOU HAVE TIME IF YOU WANT TO MAKE THE TIME FOR YOUR TIP!!

"It's selfish of you to demand so much of my time"

It's not selfish, if I want to modify my order, I am taking more of my server's time too. That's not selfish, that's getting what **I** want for **MY** money. It's not selfish, it's not considering the other customers, because they don't consider me. Do you really think that others consider others when they dine out? I doubt that. People want good service for their money, not some lazy person that doesn't want to *EARN* their pay. It's called a JOB for a reason.

"when I should be doing other things that are way more important to my other guests' dining experiences."

It's not important to you, because it's not **YOUR** money. It's important to them though. Who says but YOU that's it's less important. That's NOT A FACT, that IS TRULY YOUR OPINION!! What's important is in the eye of the beholder when it comes to things like that.

WHY the other people are more important than the customers that want separate checks? 99% of the time I have never gotten separate checks, but does that mean that when we don't get separate checks most of the time do you feel that I should feel superior to those that want separate checks?

OF COURSE NOT!! I feel that they deserve longer service if that's the type of service *THEY* want for their money. While yes, it might suck to be the people waiting, it is only fair that they get what they want for their service.

"I am insulted that you said I was lazy."

WHY? You said you don't want to do separate checks and don't want customers to have a lot of modifications, so how can you say that's not being lazy, huh?

You don't want to do that extra work, that's why it IS a FACT that is LAZY. That's not an opinion, that is a FACT!

"I doubt that you tip 25-30% on your bill because you realize that you are a pain in the ass."

My husband and I truly do, HONESTLY. The service has to be good though. You can't forget side items or condiments or get things wrong, then get that much. That's got to be EARNED!!

"Most people like you put your server through hell and then leave a standard tip."

Maybe you view that, because you are willing to give LESS than standard service even(not willing to take modified orders or do separate checks, which this alone proves you would NEVER GO ABOVE AND BEYOND the call of duty, so WHY should you get more than the standard tip if you aren't willing to do more for your honestly, LESS THAN STANDARD SERVICE, huh?

"You probably send items back as well, and I bet that you forewarn your server with a threat to send back anything that doesn't meet your "standards"."

I have sent things back before. I also have told them in a NICE way if they say for example "The bacon is crispy here" I tell them that I have sent it back before, so please put into the computer that I would like very crispy bacon so I won't have to send it back. Something like that so they can know they will not have more work if they do as I tell them to do, DUHH!! It's to their benefit too, not just mine to not have as much trips back and forth. Sometimes the bacon is covered up, so then unless the server admits fault for putting the order in wrong, I go with that it is the cook's fault. The bacon at times is not covered up so that's when I know who's fault it is when I see it either limp or crispy appearing. You can just notice that without touching bacon if the bacon is not covered up.

Shouldn't I be able to send it back to get what **I** want for **MY** hard earned money if it's not up to "MY" standards? WHY should I not be able to?

"I make very good money as a server;"

You could make more if you weren't so uptight about the more work in the service issues.

I'd rather make more than make less by doing more work rather than doing less work so I could get just the standard tip or less. You obviously don't feel that way to say you shouldn't modify orders or get separate checks. WHY AREN'T YOU WILLING TO BUST YOUR BUTT FOR THE CUSTOMER, HUH? WHY BE SO UNWILLING TO DO MORE EXTRA TASKS? THAT IS BEING LAZY AND THAT IS A FACT TO NOT BE WILLING TO DO EXTRA TASKS FOR CERTAIN CUSTOMERS!!

"It's when I have to deal with people like you that my job bec

Springs1 10 months ago

Continued from last posts:

"It's when I have to deal with people like you that my job becomes difficult."

I am not difficult. If you LISTEN and VERIFY the order BEFORE bringing it out for any errors you don't have to TOUCH the food to notice the mistakes or mistake, the job isn't that difficult then, is it?

If you stop complaining about separate checks and just do as the customer wants without complaining about it, it won't be that difficult when you see a nice tip at the end, now would it? You are lazy; you aren't willing to do more than standard service, if anything, you want to do less than standard service.

Stef319 10 months ago

It absolutely is my fault if the order comes out to the table incorrect. As much as I try to be the one to get my dinners out, every once in a while someone else does and they usually don't put the care into reading slips like I do. I hate when my tables' food is "auctioned off", which is usually what happens when another server brings out my food. And i guarantee that they don't put the time and care that I do- if there is a pasta dish, I give a twirling spoon and extra parm cheese. Steak knives for anything that may require more than a butter knife to cut. I give extra napkins, wet naps, and an empty bowl for shelled fish. I take a pepper mill and offer fresh-ground pepper. I put dressings on the side so the guest has control over how much to put on. I take the proper condiments (steak sauces, ketchup, etc). I do this for my tables as well as others' tables. It's unfortunate that the other servers don't do the same for me. I would much rather that they did not touch my tables' food cause they usually mess it up. Because they don't check the ticket. And even though I sent it in correctly, the kitchen makes soooo many mistakes. If I do ring something in incorrectly, I usually catch it soon after I ring it in because I go over my orders in my head so I don't have to look at the slip when I'm handing out food. By the time my food is ready, I know where all the food goes without looking at the slips. I think it's much more personable. I had a table of six last night who wanted their check split at the end of their meal. I said "absolutely", with a smile on my face, and they asked "do you remember who got what?", and I rattled off their entire order- drinks, apps, salads, entrees (with temps), and desserts- without looking on my notepad, according to couples.

I don't like doing separate checks. I have a lot of big parties. The majority of people don't like everything about their jobs. But I don't give the guests any crap over it. I smile and tell them "absolutely". My objective is to make guests feel as comfortable as possible.

I'm the server who will offer to take pictures of the family if I notice they have cameras. If my guests ask for the spa or equestrian center phone numbers, I'll offer to make the reservation for them. I'm the server who offers to take the table at the end of the night cause I don''t mind staying late for my guests, and I know I will NEVER make them feel rushed. I'm the server who, if a family comes in after we're closed and the kitchen is already gone, will offer them a salad or sandwich. I will even turn the grill back on to make them a burger.

I go above and beyond, but I do not like substitutions/alterations or separate checks. Maybe because it's time that I'm not seen by my guests. I like to be in the dining room as much as possible cause I like the guests to see me doing work. If they need something, they know I'm right there. I hate being "missing" for more than five minutes, cause what if I get a new table, or my existing tables need something. If I'm tied up separating checks, I ask the other servers to check on my section, but I only trust a handful to actually care to help.

Stef319 10 months ago

And I do offer to box food table-side for my guests. I bring out the boxes, along with takeout plastic-ware and souffle cups for any sauces they would want to take. If they were fond of a particular sauce, I would bring out an extra one for them to take home. I wrap everything neatly in the box, paying attention to compartmentalize each item so the different items don't touch each other. I also label the boxes with the item that is in it, and date it in case it is in the fridge and they aren't sure of when they got the food. If they order a dessert that is warm, I ask if they want it heated; if they don't, I'll write on the box the instructions on how long to put it in the microwave or in the oven.

I am a former employee-of-the-month at Red Lobster. I was getting ready to go to my seminar for training when I had to move back home for a family emergency. I did the same wrapping technique there; in fact, that's where I started doing it cause the guests really appreciated it. That's very time consuming, but I'm in the dining room when I'm doing it so my guests can see me, so they know that I'm available and being helpful. I guess I'm the kind of server who likes to be available- physically in the dining room. I don't like to be on the computer where they can't see me. I don't like to be in the kitchen where they can't see me. Guest perception is everything, and if they see me, they know that I'm working hard to please them. And that's how I make my money. I hate going "missing" for five or more minutes. Maybe you know where I am cause you know I'm separating checks for your party of 20, but the other guests don't know that. All they know is they can't find their server.

The things I complain about I still do, and I do it with a smile on my face. And anything that may be difficult, even if the guest admits that it is difficult, I make a point to reassure them that it is an easy task. My job is to make them feel comfortable. And make them feel like no request is too much. But that doesn't mean that I have to like it.

I go out of my way to make sure that my guests have the best experience possible. If they want a sauce that isn't on the menu, I'll ask the kitchen if they can whip it up; if they give me a hard time with something, I'll do it myself. I'll bitch about it in the kitchen, but when I walk out to that table, and I get the "thank you soooo much", I smile graciously. So basically what I'm saying is even though I don't like doing certain aspects of my job, I do them anyway. I get excellent comments every weekend I work; I have more people who request me than any other server where I work- by far.

Here's an example: An elderly woman used to come into Red Lobster with her daughter. She loved crab legs but she had a hard time opening them. I would crack open every shell of her 1 1/2 lb crab legs for her (with gloves on, obviously); I'd start it in the kitchen, do about a half pound at a time, then check on my other tables, go back and do more. That is service that is above and beyond. That's why i get awards. That is why I don't want to be in the kitchen on the computer or on the line, trying to correct kitchen mistakes. I wish I had more time to give that kind of personal service. It's not that I'm lazy, in fact it's just that I want to use that time to do really special things and I wish I had more time to do them.

Springs1 10 months ago

Your blog truly portrays a lazy person rather than the person you are portraying now.

That's great that you do all of that. I just have had a lot of bad servers out there. A few times I have had servers ask me if *I* could remind them of the condiments I ordered. My jaw almost hit the floor with such a lazy and rude request. One was at Denny's and I just simply asked him "Why would I have to remind you if you write it down?" Another was at Applebee's, and told her off telling her that you write it down and compare it to the food, that this is not McDonald's where you aren't getting tipped. I was just so mad, because it was like 2 or 3 containers worth even, not that much to really be so lazy about. The last one I couldn't tell off, because I was with a large group of people after a funeral, so I just said if she could bring them out ahead of time.

There is no way I could remember without rereading and most servers can't. I know, I have had some experiences where some servers just aimlessly handed food off of the tray and it wasn't for us, not even close to what we ordered.

I worked at a donut shop/diner from 1998-2002 off and on, which added up to about a little over 2yrs. It wasn't anywhere near the same as being a waitress, but we did serve regular food items like burgers, biscuits, sandwiches, etc. The thing is, my short term memory was so bad that I could remember if the customers said if they wanted cajun or regular fries or if they wanted cheese by the time I got to the register if I didn't write their order down. THAT'S HONESTLY how MOST servers are that they can't remember unless they write stuff down and go back to their pad of paper to reread the orders.

I just get a lot of lazy servers. So sorry if I attacked you, but you have to understand when it's YOUR service how YOU feel when things don't go well. It really sucks.

That's great, you go all out and then some. Your blog definitely doesn't portray that. Keep up the good work. It just bothers me when servers like you are portraying in this blog and the ones that asked me if I could remind them(that's their job since they are the ones getting paid) about the condiments I ordered.

It sounds like you are the 100% TOTAL OPPOSITE of being lazy. I understand that you don't have to like your job, but you are saying in this blog for *CUSTOMERS* to have to do their own separating "Figure the bill out yourself." That's not something you should say. Servers are supposed to do the work. The customer is supposed to be able to relax and have a good time NOT doing that boring work of figuring out checks, considering they aren't the ones getting paid.

Now do you see WHY I attacked you? Because you are portraying a person that just doesn't want to do the work(kind of like the servers that wanted me to remind them). Now, you say you do all kinds of things. You seem to be the opposite of your blog now, for real! Keep on being a caring and hard worker!

Springs1 10 months ago

typo

"The thing is, my short term memory was so bad that I could remember if the customers said if they wanted cajun or regular fries or if they wanted cheese by the time I got to the register if I didn't write their order down."

I meant that I "COULDN'T" remember. Sorry.

Stef319 10 months ago

Springs, to be 100% honest, that blog was the first one I have ever written. I'm looking for a new paralegal job and I was on job websites when I saw an ad for "hub pages: make money at home writing". I thought, "Hey, what the hell. I'll check it out". So I'm trying to figure out what to write about, and then it came to me. "Stef, write about what you hate about work". And I did it off the top of my head based on random irritants from the prior weekend. Then I got your comments and I was SOOOO pissed!!! But all you knew about me was my 20 minute bitch session. And you kept calling me lazy. I couldn't go to sleep so I had to grab another beer to calm down. After reading my blog, I understand why you thought that. That's why I called it a "confession", cause if I waited on you, you'd never in a million years think that I was annoyed with anything. I am a really nice person, but I have my bad days, and when I have my bad days at work I have to keep it in and pretend like everything's awesome. I used this blog to vent some frustration and was kind of looking for some other servers to join in and vent with me. But I wasn't trying to condone any bad behavior toward guests. I'm new to this. Maybe I really should focus on the positive rather than the negative. You're a woman and you know when you've had a rough weekend and you're pushed to your limits and you just can't take one more person asking for one more thing of you.

I definitely know where you're coming from with servers, though. I will agree that 90% of our servers ARE lazy. They drive me crazy; as lazy as they are with their tables (who are providing their tips), imagine how lazy they are when it's time to do sidework and help clean the restaurant. They're always on their cell phones, outside smoking cigarettes, flirting with the cooks, when they should be paying attention to their guests. And I bet they get your orders wrong all the time because you're right-they are lazy. They expect a 20% tip always. They wonder why they get "stiffed" on a tip sometimes. It's because they didn't deserve a tip!

That's why I said that I don't want other servers taking my food out. I don't trust them at all. They don't read the kitchen slips, they bring a steak out without a steak knife, they forget sides, and they auction off food. It ends up costing me more time cause not only do I have to apologize for their order delivery not being correct, but I still have to go back to the kitchen and get whatever they forgot. And god forbid that the guest asks THEM for something because not only will they not get it, but they won't even have the courtesy to tell me what the table wanted.

I go out to eat whenever my boyfriend have time, which is not very often, and I absolutely agree with you that most servers are very lazy. I don't request much; I'm pretty simple when it comes to ordering, as well as my boyfriend, but I do request my steaks AS RARE AS POSSIBLE. Now, what are the odds that I'm going to get a true rare steak? About 50/50,which is ridiculous.

I always critique my servers, and my boyfriend gets pissed, but I expect my server to provide me with good service. I'm a little different with my requests, though.

Here are my problems:

The server should know which wines are available on the wine list. Know what you're out of. I don't know how many times I ordered a bottle of wine and the server comes back and says, "sorry, we're out of that". The server should know what alcohol is available; it is just as bad as not having a particular food item.

Another big problem I have: I like to take my time; obviously if I'm ordering a bottle of wine I want to sit and relax. I tell the server ahead of time that I do not want them to put the food order in right away, and I want plenty of time between courses. Exception to this is if it's a busy night, but since I always work weekends it's usually on a Monday or Tuesday and restaurants aren't busy so it's no big deal to sit long and take up that space. Plus, the way we order when we go out, we spend a lot and I let the server know that I'm also a server so that waiter or waitress has a good inclination that it's gonna be a good tip. But my food still comes out fast.

Also, dishes are hardly ever cleared between courses. And wine service is almost never up to par. The server should be around to fill my glass, like I do with my guests. Now, I admit that I'm not around every time they need their glasses to be filled, but I at least try to fill once around appetizer time and once while they're eating dinner (when I check back to see how everything is)-which, by the way, is TWO minutes after the dinner is brought out, not when I'm almost finished. Also, I do not appreciate the female servers flirting with my boyfriend. I'm a pretty good looking girl (so I think) and when I wait on a couple, I stand closer to the female, and ALWAYS pay more attention to her. If the couple is joking with me, I ALWAYS take the girl's side on ANY issue, as to not offend the woman. Some of these skanky girls flirt with him, thinking that he's paying and he'll leave her a bigger tip. Couldn't be further from the truth, though, cause if I pay, I leave the tip, and if he pays, I leave the tip as well. He's an IT guy and leaves the tipping to me. So flirting with my boyfriend will only decrease your tip.

Anyway, sorry to get you upset over my blog. I was just blowing off some steam. And please know that there really are some good servers out there who want you to have a good time when you go out. We are out there; we may be few and far between, but we do exist.

Stef319 10 months ago

With the condiment situation: The server is taking the order, and not writing the NUMBER of sides that you want with the dish, even though you are expressly stating how many you want? That doesn't make any sense (on the server). All you have to do is write BLEU CHEESE-2. Or 4. or whatever. The odd thing about that is that it is not an inconvenience for the the server at all. Most sides are pre-made in containers in the fridge, so if the server has to go in the cooler for one side, all he has to do is grab 2 or 3 instead. And then it's done. Even if the server has to get the side (which I usually do immediately after I put in the order so that it's ready when the food comes up), how hard is it to fill up a few extra cups?

If you want three sides of ranch, so what? Bring out three. Managers may ask why I'm taking three sides out and if they do I just reply "the guest asked for it" and it's done. If I encountered a problem where I was messing up side orders, I'd find a better system of writing my orders. One thing that I've never been taught in any restaurant is how to write down an order. Every server has his own technique. And if I'm messing up, I find a different technique. I circle items that need to come up first. I capitalize and write large any special instructions, so they catch my attention when I look at my notes. If there is any question as to what someone ordered, I immediately repeat the order back to verify its correctness. I've caught many mistakes and prevented major problems by reading back orders I was unsure about (most of my problems with order-taking are because most of my guests are from Japan, China, or the Phillipines). A lot of times, one person will order for the whole table, or if not, the guests speak very broken English. I particularly have a problem deciphering between "salmon" and "same thing". After one time of bringing salmon, when the guest wanted the same thing as the person next to them, and another time of ordering a filet (same thing as the person next to them) instead of the salmon, I decided to not chance it any more and ask.It's fine if I'm not sure to immediately ask or repeat back, but once I leave the table the chance is gone. If i have to go back after I left, that looks REALLY BAD on my part. I lose the guest's trust, and I have to regain it, which is hard once you lose it. That means that I have to be completely flawless to redeem myself. I think that note-taking should be part of every server's training. I think that maybe since the age of computers it has been forgotten; before computers there were mandatory requirements for how orders should be written so that the cooks would have a uniform method. Now the servers write the orders however they please, and it's usually quite sloppy. I think that may be a big problem why you're not getting what you order.

Springs1 9 months ago

Stef319

"I couldn't go to sleep so I had to grab another beer to calm down."

I am very sorry I made you that mad that you couldn't sleep. I sincerely apologize.

If I could possibly give you a few things that may or may not be helpful that are MY opinion of how some of the things I experience could and should be improved on in my opinion?

1. Servers that make comments about what you order I find not to be nice or considerate when you didn't ask for their opinion and you don't know them. I would think it would be common sense, but some tell you their opinion whether it's good or bad like one good one was "Good choice" or "That's my favorite." While the server may try to be friendly, if it's a server that I have never had before and don't know, I definitely don't care about their opinion unless I specifically ask for it, especially when you have had the item a bunch of times, why should it matter their opinion? It wastes time when all you want to do is order and be able to get your food or drink faster.

2. Servers that refill iced tea without asking and/or refilling a glass at the table even if they do ask. I feel a server should be getting you a new glass just as most restaurants do with soft drinks, especially if you like lemon, you would get a new fresh clean glass with lemon. I happen to not get lemon with mine, but some do. Also, the tea gets watery if you put it in the same glass that has been sitting for a while that has some ice that has melted in the glass. Some people also don't like to have to sweeten their tea again once they have it perfect as well.

3. If the drink is a 2-for-1 special, I feel the server should let the customer know this ahead of time and also offer to let them have one at a time rather than give them 2 glasses of drink at once. Especially, if it's on the rocks, the other glass is going to melt some if it's not drank in a fast amount of time.

4. If the customer asks for a dessert, that's a good time to ask about the check as well and if they do want the check, I feel the best servers are that they bring the check BEFORE the dessert ONLY if I wanted the check of course. I absolutely HATE when servers bring checks with dessert. Why? You want to eat your dessert when it arrives(especially ice cream melts if it's something with ice cream) and you also would like to leave. Now, you have to leave your desert there and read your bill line by line when you could have done that before the dessert arrived. OR You could just let the check sit and wait to pay after, but then that means you could be there another 5-10minutes waiting for your server to come to ring you up.

5. Servers should bring out soft drinks, tea, or water(drinks of that nature) out BEFORE any bar drinks IF the server has time. For one, it let's customers quench their thirst faster(better tip from me and probably most people when servers think about as if that were them). Another, it gives customers a chance to possibly order something when you come back such as an appetizer or something like that.

That's just some things that bother me that I find a lot of servers do the things I said that I didn't want them to do. Do you agree or disagree with any and WHY, especially if you disagree.

"They expect a 20% tip always. They wonder why they get "stiffed" on a tip sometimes. It's because they didn't deserve a tip!"

In all honesty, do you think the lazy servers really think about "Yeah, I know I didn't try my best" or do you think they think they did the best job they could?

I am just curious what's your opinion if they really know deep down inside that they are lazy and they know it?

Stef319 9 months ago

"I am very sorry I made you that mad that you couldn't sleep. I sincerely apologize."

Springs, even though didn't have to, apology is graciously accepted. I just read the blog right before I was on my way up to bed, and I saw "lazy asshole" and got pissed. I was asleep an hour later. Thanks, though.

Stef319 9 months ago

Here's MY opinion:

1."Servers that make comments about what you order I find not to be nice or considerate when you didn't ask for their opinion and you don't know them. I would think it would be common sense, but some tell you their opinion whether it's good or bad like one good one was 'Good choice' or 'That's my favorite'."

I say "good choice" or "that's my favorite", with other opinions, but that is only when the guest ASKS me for an opinion, or implies that he/she wants my opinion. I judge how to treat my tables when I greet them. Some guests ask me which items are most popular, and a lot of guests ask me for recommendations. I work at a resort, though, but it did happen at Red Lobster, Lone Star, Bonanza,etc. If they don't want to be bothered and just want to give their order, then I don't give my two cents.

How I tell: I approach the table, making eye contact as I walk toward them. I say "Good evening (or whatever), how are you tonight? (enter response here). How they respond is the first clue. If it's a long story about how they are on vacation and they just came back from the spa, etc., I know that they're probably gonna want some chit chat- maybe not my opinion yet,but they will probably be talkers. Others will respond with a very short "well", or "fine". Some may not respond at all. These are the guests who don't want me "up in their business". After I greet them, say my name, and go over the specials and features, I will offer to take the drink order, and also if they want to place an app order as well. I guess I can kill two birds with one stone here by saying that I usually take soft drinks BEFORE bar drinks cause our bar is usually slower than I am, and I want the guest to know that I am quick. I will tell them the bar drinks will be up soon, and maybe take an order.

Anyway, back to the "good choice" thing. Many guests where I work want to know what the local favorites are, what the popular dishes are, and WHAT I RECOMMEND. This is where I give the "my favorite", and when I guide them or give them two or three options, and they choose one, that is a "good choice". It is about personalized service, and the server has to know that it's with only certain people that you should make these comments.

Basically, I disagree that it should never be done, but I agree with you that it shouldn't be done in your circumstances (I'm fair in assuming that you DON'T ask the server's opinion on menu selections).

Stef319 9 months ago

2. "Servers that refill iced tea without asking and/or refilling a glass at the table even if they do ask."

AGREE- Always a fresh glass. And never refill at a table. Only water should be refilled table-side.new straw, new lemon (if needed), and let me add something: If it is fresh-brewed iced tea and is still warm, and extra glass of ice is usually appreciated, as well as an iced tea spoon. Also, the guest should never have to wait for sugar.

3. What is a 2-for-1? Two drinks for one price? If so, yes, why should you have to get them at the same time? I don't drink fast; my second drink would be watered down. If it's company policy, that's stupid. If they're really strict, though, and they make you get both at once, I suggest you ask for the ice on the side on the second drink, or no ice and ask for a fresh side of ice later.

4. "If the customer asks for a dessert, that's a good time to ask about the check as well and if they do want the check, I feel the best servers are that they bring the check BEFORE the dessert ONLY if I wanted the check of course."

I always carry a copy of my guests' check with me after their food is served. I usually have three or four tables at once and I put all the bills in my server book, and carry one checkholder in my apron. This way, any time after their dinner is served, the guest can ask for the bill and I will have it on me. If the guest orders dessert, I have to wait until they get their dessert to give them their check (unless otherwise asked).

Stef319 9 months ago

"I am just curious what's your opinion if they really know deep down inside that they are lazy and they know it?"

I think that they feel that they are ENTITLED to a 15% tip if they do the basics: Taking the order, bringing out drinks, food, etc. They don't understand that things they DON"T do will affect this amount, and they may get nothing at all if they fail in other ways. We have a girl who gets "stiffed" every two weeks or so. I found this odd, since I work at a nice place and I have never gotten "stiffed" there in three years. Then I worked a 30-person family reunion dinner with her. She didn't greet herself, didn't go over the specials, and didn't even know what the soups, vegetables, and potatoes of the day were. Worse yet, she didn't even admit that she didn't know or excuse herself to find out- SHE SAID THE ONES FROM THE NIGHT BEFORE- which are usually never the same. Luckily, the soups were the same, but the potato and vegetable were different. She asked me about them when we were putting the order in, and didn't want to even go back and tell them that their potato was going to roasted rosemary instead of white truffle mashed, and the vegetable was going to be green beans almondine instead of broccoli rapini. I went back and apologized on her behalf to her table (we each decided to take one table of 15). Then, she kept wanting to go outside for cigarettes- with me!! Now, I smoke but not when I have tables, especially a party of 30!! And do you honestly think that it's a good idea with that many people for BOTH servers to leave the guests with no one to look after them for that long? She was horrible; she auctioned off her food, she took her dessert order incorrectly, and she wasn't offering refills on drinks. Her tables' water carafes were empty. I was picking up the slack, and telling her what she needed to do, and every time I'd tell her to do something, she'd say "I know". So I assume that she acts this way with her tables. She admits that she does not try to upsell EVER, which i admit that it should only be sometimes, not always. The hostess told me that she has a hard time finding her to tell her she has tables. She knows she cuts corners, and she puts texting and smoking above her guests' needs, but I think that she still expect 15%.

Stef319 9 months ago

Correction: I DID get "stiffed" once, about two years ago. It was a Sunday night, and we only had the usual two servers on. For some reason, we got SLAMMED. Our restaurant seats 72 in the dining room and 70 outside on the patio. Every table inside was taken, in addition to two parties of 14 outside. Our policy then was that no one waits to be seated, rather, we seat you and then we get to you. It was horrible; my guests were ordering four-course meals and I couldn't keep up with service. All I could do was ring in orders and deliver orders. Service was terrible; I knew it. We had the golf pro taking orders, the spa manager bartending, even the general manager was bussing tables. We tried to just get through, but people were PISSED. Understandably so, and they took it out on me so bad that I started to cry in the middle of the dining room cause I hate when people are yelling at me when I'm doing the best I can. One table "stiffed" me. I understand why, though. We were giving out free dinners and drinks left and right. Some guests were understanding and telling me it's not my fault, which it wasn't, but others were cursing at me and telling me I ruined their night. The thing was I was trying my best. That was the only time there that I got "stiffed" and I understand why.

We have three servers who really care about giving good service- all the others are LAZY. Do they know it- no. The think quantity, not quality. The good ones will pass up on tables cause they want to give good service to the ones that they already have. The greedy ones (who I call "sweepers" will take as many as possible and give basic service, thinking that more people=more money. But the guests of the "sweepers" tables suffer cause they wait and don't get personalized service. Then we have ones who just want to make $50 bucks and leave (just enough to pay their bar tab)to go out with their friends.

Now, I like to chit chat with my servers; I'm curious about them. I notice that they "bad mouth" other tables, which is SO unprofessional, especially to guests you don't know, and also I hate when servers call me "honey" or "sweetie". To me, they're terms of endearment, and you don't know me. I also find it condescending in many ways. What do you think?